i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
So vagazzling was a success
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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