never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
