What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
