So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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