At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
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