Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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