The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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