Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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