Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
