never play flip cup with pint glasses
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
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