I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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