sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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