I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
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