I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
