no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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