I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
