I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
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