Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
tell me about the eggs
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize