Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
