My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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