She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
