google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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