I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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