i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
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He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
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Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
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