super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Randomize