do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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