Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
They have beer where we have blood.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
