how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
false alarm. still invincible.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
