that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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