am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
