Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
