i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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