you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
