I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Randomize