Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
