Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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