you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
