..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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