# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Is it penis luge time yet?
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
