so explain again why im purple
no
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Randomize
