For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
