I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize