When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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