i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
