everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
