why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Randomize
