I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
