I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
