absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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