Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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