When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
